How to stop feeling sick

All these fearless people,

Is the experience of fear still a life?

Is the experience of discomfort a notable thing?

And comparatively, if noting anything, of value?

What would make my experience valuable?

Maybe even without value it is no different.

The feeling itself is a natural instinct in order to not die

That says a lot about my time spent.

People are grateful for life, what makes them so or like my life direction, is it actually less of a choice!

mind altering, its a knockout that's the game

I'm on the drugs that killed river Phoenix

It's a knockout that's the name, its a knockout that's the game, its a knockout that's the name of the game.

Can't help but think that this state of absorption of mind in the day to day and in particular the lack of attention focus which I was once famously revered by myself, is a product of clonazepam. I am grateful for the relief at not knowing my own anxiety of doing but I am also perturbed constantly by my own lack of awareness, particularly of others. My senses are dulled it seems to be at others levels, although I still maintain the values, the actual carry out is lost.

So what is lost?

The reaction to a person's feelings. The attention is there but there is a lack of awareness of value to reaction at the time. 

My interactions with others although may always have been as quick are less focussed on the feeling in responding to it. It's like I let the moment fly as it is. Yet I also still am aware that it's not how I'd like to conduct myself.

The days aren't nice, let me off the self propelling societal push.

It's on the go, its on the run

You just can't stop

The momentum.

It's consistent, its persistent

It seems like fun

But it's undone.

Cacophony of stress

A build up of muscle tension

But really it's all mental.

Not looking in a direction 

Just being pushed

Not sure how to brake the slippy slide.

I want to talk, I want to look

But time just keeps on keeping on.

And then the day is over 

And then I feel the burn

Of a constant propulsion.

Cry's.